DURING THE NIGHT

The point: we have gathered intelligence that indicates that vegetables are going online. Not vegetative state patients. We mean plants that look like any other plants but are smart enough to pick up smartphones during the night and create fake social networking service profiles to interact with humans and other vegetables online. It seems they spend lots of time exchanging messages about the possibility of mind control of plants over humans. So far, their main objective appears to be having the nearby human change the music that is playing on the stereo.