Right after

eIt was not that he did not have the money. OK, he could not afford the comics. And it was summertime and he had no ventilator because he cut the cord of the one he had to use it to hang himself and then found out there was simply no place in the damn apartment to hang the cord from and he didn't want to go out looking for a tree he was shy he gave up the idiot could not even be brave enough to kill himself out in the street as a big Fuck You Goodbye to the universe and so there he was with a cordless ventilator which was a good thing for it was old and whinny and he eventually threw it away and had no money to get another one fuck it he was gonna read everything inside the book shop for free fuck them for having such a nice carpet where you can sit down and read the whole damn book shop when you only work like four hours a day for not much money fuck this system where you gotta work eight hours five days every week and even then your pay can be too small and nobody cares because you don't have enough money for them to care about you so fuck it all he was gonna read all the comics he could get his hands on for free and then go back and see if there were any phone messages but there were none the bitch said she would call and then of course she vanished for the whole damn weekend he could not belive how stupid he was for loving someone who clearly loved him but also clearly was not capable of being reliable when he needed it the most what the fuck was he complaining about at least she had a good job and did nost pester him for cash but her good job was fucking up her brain so she just forgot to call or whatever the fuck it was he did not care anymore he was pissed and would stay that way until she called at last and then of course he would be the happy idiot so very happy to hear from her maybe not maybe this time he would tell her to fuck off and shove her absent mind love up her ass fuck off my life you stupid useless egotistic snotty cow fuck you get the fuck out of my life who need this waiting I don't give a shit if you can't deal with your work or social life or whatever keeps you from taking a minute to leave a message in my answering machine instead of leaving me waiting in hell you heartless bitch I wish I would just die and leave you sick with guilt I love you so much it must be a disease this can't be healthy he was thinking and then he gave up thinking and dived into the comics and thanked the gods for the air conditioning in the book shop and when he went home to eat something out of the fridge he passed this unbelieveable reader she was taller than him and looked japanese and had a big ass he simply could not talk to the woman she was so beautiful he just went home and drank a big double shot of whiskie and passed out right after wanking.