I've got everything that you want

I've got everything that you want
Like a hard-on oh so true

The basics about looking stoned: wear your sunglasses even when you are washing your face. Say something meaningless from time to time. Refuse any drug, saying you are already freaking out. If asked what you're on, say you don't know, but it looked like an aspirin. If asked about the effects, say you can't describe it, except you feel great. If asked about the man, say the guy is someone you don't know, who just told you about an hour ago that you had to try this unspecified stuff, and pretend to look for him. He will, of course, have vanished completely from the party.

People should shut up and write. A written complaint is much easier to ignore, thank the gods!